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Monday, June 29, 2009

A Draft of Obama’s Future Memoirs
  ObamaNation piece by Miguel Guanipa

One thing that Obama will probably do when he leaves office is start to write his memoirs. For all we know he may have even have started already; because Obama likes to write books.

I wonder if these memoirs would include the things today we hope he will learn, as every other president has, while he presides over the most powerful office on earth. Indeed how I wish he had learned them before he took office.

Nevertheless, without further ado, I now present you with what could very well be a first person account of what I believe will be some of the subjects that he will touch upon.

Hello, this is Barack Obama.

I wanted to share with all of you some of the things that I have learned while I was in office. I will call it: Things I Learned When I Was President.

Like some of you, I used to believe that there is nothing I need to learn. Let me say that you have provided me with my first lesson; and that is that there are people out there who are in such a dire need for a hero to worship, they will not let a smidgen of common sense get in the way of their infatuation once they find one.

I have also learned the same refrain which everyone used to badger my predecessor can also be used against my performance. For example, if I say that the economy is going to rebound, someone could just retort that simply saying something doesn’t make it so.

I learned that there are times in our lives when we need to take a sober look at what we have always considered to be our must fundamental beliefs, and perform an honest reappraisal of them, to see if they can are at least still aligned with the truth. And if they’re not, it may be time to reconsider one’s position.

Speaking of previously held fundamental beliefs, I learned that tyrants are actually really mean people, and are only interested in dialogue as long as it furthers their own agenda. They are not interested in taking advice; even if you are nice to them, and sweeten the deal with an admission of collective guilt as the imperialist, arrogant superpower that we are.

I learned (and boy this is a big one) that you can fool most of the people most of the time, and some of the people all the time, but you can’t fool all the people all the time; unless they are people like the ones I mentioned at the beginning of this draft.

I learned that, no matter how much you wish, some people will just never – I mean NEVER – go away.

I learned that some ideas that look fabulous in theory – I admit some are darn near laughable - are pretty hard to actually put into practice; even if it’s something simple like closing a detention center. 

I have learned that the world is actually a scarier place than I once thought it to be.

I learned that though there’s no substitute for the best laid plans, even the best laid plans can sometimes be beaten to a pulp by a brutal gang of facts. I borrowed that from Churchill, with whom – for the history buffs out there - I have precious little in common.

Speaking of History, I learned that I should really brush up on it before I give another international speech; there may be people listening who actually know what I am referring to and point out my utter ignorance on the subject. This reminds me, I need to have a talk with my speech writer about that. I guess that’s what you get when you have a 27 year old texting your speeches.

On a somewhat similar vein, I learned that you should never let your guard down; especially if you are talking to fans who are constantly stroking your ego and making you feel like a super star. You may just slip and say something really stupid; pull a Biden so to speak. (Note to self: consider deleting that last sentence from final draft)

And while we’re on the subject of public speaking, I learned that what I say regarding a conflict in any part of the world is of greater importance than any of the accolades I used to revel in for being such a great orator; because what is said – as well as what is left unsaid – will affect many people whose lives could very well hang in the balance.

And finally, I learned that timing is very important. And the worst regrets do not always come from speaking too soon, but more from not really thinking before speaking. Oh, and that there is also such a thing as not speaking soon enough.

I think I’ll take a break from writing and go walk my dog now.

Miguel A. Guanipa

Posted by Miguel Guanipa on 6/29/09 at 07:29 AM
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UPSSA United Progressive Socialist States of America

UPSSA United Progressive Socialist States of America